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Bill Reel – Statement on Excommunication – 12.3.2018

To those who have supported my family, me, and the podcast,

Yesterday December 2 2018 at around 12:30 in the afternoon the Stake President for the Mormon Church in my geographic location hand delivered his decision to my Disciplinary Council.  The decision was as we all had expected, I had been excommunicated.  Immediately, my family signed onto and completed their resignations.  It has been a long journey but one in which our home was united.   Our Family united in valuing truth and standing up for those who are marginalized and harmed led to our being hand in hand as we woke up to our lives.   When Mormonism one last time made it clear that the truth is not only not useful, but even more directly it is antithetical to Mormonism’s mission, our family unitedly said goodbye.

In regards to the Excommunication Document it is linked HERE

In regards to its wording, it is just more of the many games that Mormonism plays.  It speaks in generalities and as a good friend said, “it is impossible to box shadows”.  In the end Elder Oaks was correct, In Mormonism “it is wrong to criticize leaders even if the criticism is true”.  In fact it may be the only real true Doctrine left in Mormonism from the beginning of the restoration.

A lot of folks encouraged me to resign but I went out doing what I have always done which is being a voice for those who for one reason or another don’t have a voice, standing up against the the dishonest telling of our narrative, and shining a light on leaders who lie and deceive in order to protect their authority.

Mormonism, while not what it claimed to be was the very lie I needed to believe as a young man in order to change my life.  For that I say thank you.  When it fell apart my loss was so great that I only could express my fracture as a “faith crisis”.  But as time went on, I came to the realization it wasn’t a faith crisis at all.  It wasn’t me who had something wrong…. something broken.  It took years to come to grips that it was in fact Mormonism that had a Crisis.  A Truth Crisis.  It had built its entire foundation on stories that simply don’t hold up.

Its defenders try to keep us from trusting any information outside of the faith promoting point of view.  But I say read everything.  Trust no-one.  Read both sides, chase down sources, make space for even your most sacred beliefs to need adjustment and perhaps even discard.

“We must trust to nothing but facts: these are presented to us by nature and cannot deceive. We ought, in every instance, to submit our reasoning to the test of experiment, and never to search for truth but by the natural road of experiment and observation.” – Antoine Lavoisier

Mormonism can not stand an honest investigation.  I learned this the hard way.  Mormonism itself does not trust the truth seeker to explore both sides objectively and dissuades one from such a course at every turn and hence it poisons the well of every data point that seeks to expose its shadow.

To those who have sent messages, have supported the podcast by listening, giving donations, who had shown up at my disciplinary proceeding, stopped in to talk at my work, came to some event where I was in attendance, or who have followed my journey with appreciation….. Thank you!   It has been one of the best things about this journey.  Meeting, hearing from, getting to know good good people who also have woken up.  You were as much a lifeline to me as many of you claim I was to you.  The day of the “Court of Love”, I was calm and at peace.  That mindset has continued.  I am in a good place and have made peace with all that has occurred in the past month and even years.  I am proud of how I faced the challenges every step of the way in my journey.  The podcast will continue for the foreseeable future and I will continue to ensure that it offers the tools and resources to help others wake up and to deconstruct their religious system.  In fact I expect very little to change.

Lastly I want to speak to those who fear the full deconstruction of their religious system.   Many are scared of the unknown of what lies on the other side of deconstruction.  Many fear that what the Church says about those who leave could be true.  That without outer authorities within your specific tribe telling you how to live your life, your life will in fact fall apart.  While there are no guarantees, this much I do know.  I have spoken to thousands of people at this point, either by email, phone, face to face, and private messages.  I have, when I have gotten the chance, asked as many of them as I could a question?

“If you could go back to when it all fit so well and was so beautiful, and you were naive to the mess that is Mormonism, would you?”

At this point I have presented that question to hundreds and hundreds of people.  Can you guess how many answered YES?    ZERO

I want to add my testimony to theirs.  I wouldn’t go back.  This journey wasn’t easy.  It hurt and at some points it hurt a lot.  Learning your Religion and the God your religion handed you are not what was claimed is chaotic and imposed a ton of anxiety, hurt, anger, and grief.  But what I have gained from this journey I wouldn’t trade for anything.  Empathy, Learning to value authenticity over belonging, appreciation for diversity, learning to claim my independence,  recognizing the moral authority within myself, and learning to confidently stand on my own ground and for my truth, oh…. and the Best friends in the world!  I wouldn’t trade any of it.  If your scared to grow up and out, know that your not alone.  But when your ready…. lean into it.  There is a huge beautiful world out here and like always, my hand is extended for you to hold and to walk through this beautiful thing we call life together.   The world is bigger and more beautiful than Mormonism ever gave it credit for.  What a beautiful world and what a beautiful life.  I wouldn’t trade or change my journey one bit.  Thank you to those who went ahead of me and your welcome to those come after.  And in case I don’t see ya, Good Afternoon, Good Evening, and Goodnight!

56 thoughts on “Bill Reel – Statement on Excommunication – 12.3.2018”

  1. Thanks Bill for this update! Your voice has been so appreciated over the last couple of years for me on my faith journey. I’m glad to hear you will continue to help this community of truth seekers to wake up and realize the narrative of the church is not true.

    Good luck and best wishes to you and your family as you navigate the next few months. I’m glad you found a feeling of peace on the day of your church court, and that this feeling has continued afterwards as well.

    Mark B.

  2. Bill, you’ve made difference. You will always be remembered as a champion of truth. Step into the post-mo life. The water’s fine.

  3. Thanks for your courage, Bill. I have heard that those at the top of the LDS hiearchy have 10-20 billion reasons (annually) to hide from the truth. The organization has become a domination system (like ancient Egypt or Rome) for so many inside. Your courage and stand is more Christlike than anything the church administration building could muster at this point. I’ve been enlightened by your podcast and look forward to more episodes. Thank you.

  4. Thank you so much for all your efforts to find and expose the truth. From your first podcasts through this explanation of your excommunication it is very obvious that your intent was and is to find truth. It bothers me that in the letter he states that their attempts to reconcile your questions was quickly dismissed by you when in fact the exact opposite is true, you were the one seeking answers to several basic questions. I was raised in the Mormon church and served a mission before fully questioning the practices and teachings. As you stated above, I would not trade my understanding and experiences for anything but there is no chance I would ever return.

    I applaud your family for their support throughout this process and am very grateful that you have shared your experience with all of us. This is a great community and I thank you for bringing many of us together. Please continue to speak and share the truths you discover with us!


  5. Bill, thank you for your update. I grieve with you. I’ve been following your blog for a time now, and you’re right when you say that Truth matters. The following statement you said resonated with me: “Learning your Religion and the God your religion handed you are not what was claimed is chaotic and imposed a ton of anxiety, hurt, anger, and grief.” You’re right, the LDS religion and God aren’t right, and were sadly wrong. However, I want to encourage you that you can trust in the God of the Bible. The God who knows no other gods, the God who always was, always is, and always will be–the God who loves you (John 3:16), the God of the Bible. I used to believe in Mormonism wholeheartedly, and you can read my story in my book “Almost A Mormon”. There’s a copy in the St. George Public Library if you want to rent it. If you choose to read it, may it encourage you. My wife and I will commit to praying for you and your family during this time. As a missionary who I helped to leave the LDS church over a year ago told me, “Leaving Mormonism has to be treated like the death of a family member- there is trauma involved, and I had to mourn the process.” May the true God, the God of Christianity, comfort you during this time, and be blessed.

    1. Believe in the god of the Old Testament. Please, you’ve got to be kidding. Who would want to believe in a jealous God? Who would want to believe in a God that is so petty as to kill and wipe out whole cities of his children? Who would want to believe in a God who is vindictive and revengeful? If God is all-powerful and all knowing and her / his ways are so much higher than our own, then why would that being care about about making us obey him her? No thank you. I don’t want to worship the god of the Old Testament a single minute.

  6. Your question on if I would go back to when I hadn’t heard of all the messiness of the church is similar to asking ” if you could go back to when you believed in Santa – would you?” I probably would as even after I stopped believing in Santa I got to help ” Santa”. One of the highlights of my life was rebuilding and painting my bike to have it given to my younger brother from “Santa”. As far as the church goes the question is rhetorical – I can’t go back as I know too much about the hurt and damage the church causes !

  7. Bill, for the same reasons you attended the council and did not resign, you need to appeal this to the First Presidency. Make them own this unequivocally.

  8. Bill, I left Mormonism 35 years ago after serving faithfully, but doubtfully (make sense?)for 36 years. I could not reconcile fact with church dogma…just didn’t make sense. After the initial pain of exclusion, I obtained a wonderful peace of knowing I was now following truth. My family remained strong LDS’rs and that’s fine; we respect each others’ positions. I am always ready to answer questions, but I do not actively sow dissent (as you know it would be futile). I am a happy secularist today, loving life and my family. I know you are already on that path. You will love it. Regards, Jerry

  9. Thanks Bill for standing up for those who don’t feel like they have a voice. Particularly pertaining to the request of the stake pres and High council to go and talk to the people outside supporting you during the meeting to see why they stopped going to church. Why was this such a difficult request for them and our family members? I have learned so much from your podcasts and I hope to continue to learn. Thanks for telling the truth!

  10. So sorry for your loss. But the fact of the matter remainsjust because one may doubt or have issues concerning church history does not make the LDS Church any less true. Its our own judgements and leaning upon our own words instead of Gods word that cause many to fall away.

    1. It”s a fraud and when all is said and done you are relying upon the judgments of men who have no real claim to honesty. From Joseph Smith to this day there has been a level of deceit easily documented that make is a certainty that the Mormon Church is not what it claims to be.

    2. Your comment is the truest one I have seen here. as I read this, I just shook my head. God has done so much for us and I cannot believe how people see it as a lie. You might not be able to see it, but it is there, just like love. You can feel the testimony in your heart. This is so heartbreaking to hear about, even though I know many people will fall away from the church. I wholeheartedly believe that this doctrine is true and that you should not judge a whole religion for things that happened in the past. What’s done is done. Thank you for your comment.

  11. So sorry for your loss. But the fact of the matter remain just because one may doubt or have issues concerning church history or another does not make the LDS Church any less true. Its our own judgements and leaning upon our own words instead of Gods word that cause many to fall away. The LDS is church is true and Jesus is the Christ and governs it. Its His Kingdom And not mans. His Kingdom is perfect while men are not. Its mans own limited and imperfect judgement and not the truth that gets him in trouble .

    1. You have got to be kidding me… because the churches foundation is built on lies and cover up from the beginning it doesn’t make it less true? The mental gymnastics you must put yourself through to hold on is Olympic caliber. I’m impressed.

  12. Thank you for your integrity Bill! My faith journey mirrored yours in many ways. I remember listening to your first interview with John Dehlin, and I identified with many of your perspectives at that time while also understanding John’s perspective. I was still struggling with “truth”, and your vulnerability, honesty, and integrity gave me hope I could find my way through to the “truth”. Your voice meant a lot to me when I was transitioning out of Mormonism, thank you!

  13. I’ve known for years this would come about,…and I WELCOME YOU! You already know there are many who love you, have walked the same pathway, and its a pretty good bet many more will walk this path as well.

    I’m happy to know your family followed you.

    Bill,…keep the podcasts coming. And, since you are officially “out”…now you no longer need to walk a careful line. Say it like it is.

    I will continue to add my support to the pod-cast and be an avid listener.

  14. Are you going to appeal your excommunication?
    Sounds like you probably won’t since all your family has resigned.

    May not be worth your time any more.

    Well welcome to your new faith and religion.
    The religion of the universe.

  15. “I will give you one of the Keys of the mysteries of the Kingdom. It is an eternal principle, that has existed with God from all eternity: That man who rises up to condemn others, finding fault with the Church, saying that they are out of the way, while he himself is righteous, then know assuredly, that that man is in the high road to apostasy; and if he does not repent, will apostatize, as God lives.” – Joseph Smith

    Another day, another apostate proves the Prophet correct

    1. Circular Reasoning. Put aside man-made ideas, and read the Holy Bible. God said he would preserve His Word, and He has done so,

  16. Wonderful post, Bill. I, too, would not change my journey if I could – painful though it has been at times, the cost of living an authentic life is absolutely worth it, and if the hard times have been harder, the good times have been proportionately better. I am finally beginning to find the “peace that passeth understanding” I was promised is within my grasp. I never thought I would find it outside of organized religion, but such is the unpredictability of life. I owe Mormonism for teaching me to search for and value truth, and am grateful for that, even though that search has led me to places I never thought I would go.

  17. Ten years ago, started a very similar journey as yours and faced much of it alone. But then, I had learned to stand alone many years before that.

    It would have been helpful to have more people like you around at the time. Glad you’re available now for those who need the support.

    If I could pass on one thing?


    In fact if we want to be truly loyal to the church we have to put truth first.

    We do the church a disservice when we become “ENABLERS” out of a misguided sense of loyalty.

    For all those fearful members out there, I know it’s hard but sometimes we have to grow a spine and stand up on our two feet as God intended.

    Best regards,


  18. Thanks for your posts and your thoughts and sharing of your learning. What a process this is. I like how you said it wasn’t your “faith crisis” it was the church’s “truth crisis.” Once I discovered truth, I felt like my life had been built on a foundation of stories that simply could not hold up to the truth. It made me angry to know that I had taught classes in church and told stories that proved to be false or misleading.

    Do you know who sings the song on the video? I really liked it. Thanks for sharing it. A fellow truth seeker.

  19. Along with many of us out here in the lone and dreary world, you have long ago left the Matrix. While we may miss the artificial social aspects the members provide, I prefer the real world and the closeness of the Savior. He is there, right beside, with an arm around those who love Him.

    The current vanilla pudding, cotton candy, vacuous nature of the modern LDS institution and its philosophy of men mingled with scripture, is not nourishing to the soul.

    Alleluia for truth. Alleluia for agency. Neither of which are a part of the modern LDS institution. The Brighamites reign supreme. They killed Joseph and then they killed the church.

  20. Bill, sorry you made this decision, the Church is true whether you believe it or not. Somewhere along the line you either lost your testimony or never gained one or someone hurt you in the church to bring you to this state. May you one day return to the true path. May the love of Heavenly Father be upon you.

    1. John… sigh… THIS is precisely the problem. Being indoctrinated to say “the church is true, no matter what” is just an defense mechanism to ignore ANYTHING that doesn’t match the narrative you want to follow. It’s allowing yourself to not address the hard data. You are literally saying, “the Church is true… regardless of the facts.” But what Bill “believes” (as you put it) is actually supported with demonstrable data. It’s not purely anecdotal. It’s not purely faith. And as we have all seen, FAITH can be misplaced, particularly when there’s nothing to really support it.

      Here’s the thing… facts DO matter. Data IS important. If what you believe can’t hold up to any scrutiny… then maybe… just maybe… you need to dig deeper. You need to ask questions. You need to answer the hard questions.

      Interesting that you insist the ONLY possible reason he left is that he lost his testimony or never really had one. That’s just attacking the seeker of truth and allowing yourself to continue ignoring the facts.

      Just please, honestly consider this… what IF what you have been taught isn’t true? Marinate on that for just a moment…

      If that were the case… how would you want to learn about it? Would you be willing to learn that? Would you EVER been willing to even hear it? Or would you stay willfully ignorant just to preserve what you WANT to believe?

      Just my 2 cents

    2. Good day John. Mormonism is true. The more you study and the more you adhere to the the principles of the Gospel you will understand the TRUTH. The Truth is plain and simple. You are on the correct path/s. Give up nothing. Hold steadfast and one day you’ll will see the LDS church teaches that Mormonism isn’t the only way. That’s wierd to understand but one day you’ll get it. Jesus said,” Be of good cheer. I have overcome the world.” Peace and love to you brother.

  21. You’re awesome Bill! Thank you for your efforts to encourage the LDS church to be honest and forthright in their dealings. The gospel principles book discusses honesty as it says:

    “We can also intentionally deceive others by a gesture or a look, by silence, or by telling only part of the truth. Whenever we lead people in any way to believe something that is not true, we are not being honest.”

    I believe that the leadership of the LDS church is dishonest by this very statement in soooo many ways.

  22. My advice: now that the expected has happened, stop hanging around the Mormon watercooler. Spend your time and energy on something that brings you and your family happiness, rather than exhaust additional effort pointing out the ever-present flaws in something that brings you sadness. You’ve successfully proven to yourself and many others that this is not the place for you…it’s done. Why would you continue to bathe in the swamp? Further effort in that regard is beating a dead horse.

    1. Did Jesus stop beating the dead horses which were the Pharisees? only with His last breath in which He asked His Father to forgive all

  23. Bill, I’m really glad your family is making this journey together. I know how hard it is. But I know you are right about the fact that we can learn to be our own moral authorities and be not just good, but great people!

    Pres Carnavale wrote something interesting about his views on the Church at the local level. I think he’s right–at the the local level, the Church can be incredible. But I’ve learned as a gay man that it doesn’t matter how earnest or compassionate people are at the local level if something is rotten at the top. Local leaders will defer to their line authorities, and ultimately they will side with higher ups every time, because that kind of obedience is a central doctrine of Mormonism. No matter what they want to change to help you, their hands are tied, because the Church is run by men who came of age during World War II. And their view of the world reflects that.

  24. Except in your case, as with many others, the voice in the sky didn’t try to convince you to stay using marketing and good feelings. The truth set you free.

  25. Wow Bill. Read the transcripts and listened to what I could and you said EXACTLY the things I would want to say. It truly isn’t OUR integrity that’s in question, it’s the church’s, however there is no question they don’t have integrity.

    You’re one of the good guys in this fight to call our truth. Thank you, again.

  26. Dear Bill!

    Congratulations on your Graduation!

    Graduation from what?

    Well, nothing less than Graduation from Spiritual Prison, that’s what.

    Being a TBM is about like living your entire life in your Mom’s basement … and paying her 10% rent. Shielded from the Real World and from the responsibility of navigating YOUR OWN LIFE, Mormons avoid the growing pains of actually growing up and becoming autonomous adults.

    The Plan of Eternal Training Wheels …

    Your Court of Love was a mold-breaker! High councilors actually spoke? That’s gotta stop! They spoke their truth acknowledging that you spoke only truth about the Church … just not quite softball enough? Too much edge? Huge they acknowledged that Bill Reel does not belong in the Church … because the Church does not tolerate Truth Tellers.

    Well done! Well played! Well spoken! Well executed!

    You are helping thousands of others find their own way … over … under … around … or through … the IRON BARS of the IRON ROD.

  27. Thank you Bill for all you’ve done, continue to do and for your honest efforts in supporting so many in our faith journeys. In tears over the video you shared. Sending my love to you and your sweet family.

  28. Best of luck to you! Now you don’t have to have a beef with anyone because you’re not answering to them any more. Good for you and good for the church.

  29. Bill,
    My faith in Christ is not based on words but rather more spiritual. You will always be my brother and have my good thoughts towards you and your family.

  30. Bill, thank you for this. Your words clearly represent all of my concerns as well. And I learned some new deeply concerning items to research further.

    I sincerely hope those that choose to stay will at least be willing to listen, to read and to ask questions.

  31. i understand that it is very unfair. honesty, god doesnt work through deceit ful purposes according to thier doctrine but i have a problem with being told halftruths like this quote FROM A LEADER “This Church has nothing whatever to do with those practicing polygamy. … If any of our members are found to be practicing plural marriage, they are excommunicated, the most serious penalty the Church can impose. Not only are those so involved in direct violation of the civil law, they are in violation of the law of this Church” (“What Are People Asking about Us?” Ensign, Nov. 1998, 71).lie !!!but they never said it was an eternal stucture of heaven to be required to FOLLOW THIER IDEA REQUIREMENTS OF THEIR converters and others.its misleading.!!! straight off.I HAVE A problem with a prelife name coming off the computer depending on the day you go to the temple. it just confers to me its not true.WHAT I UNDERSTAND

  32. So when my grandma died when I was like 13 I changed for the worse because a part of me died when she past away so I hated god for it and cursed him and I was confused a couple years later my grandpa died that really destroyed me I was so angry at god for what he done he took my grandpa and I was wishing I could kill god myself and I started following satan to despise him I listen alittle bit and read a bit of the satanic bible and girls rejecting me I had lot of crushes because of that I had suicidal thoughts and many attempts I started drinking and smoking weed I prayed for years and years for god to kill me to take the pain away then I had a decision to make Scott a friend of mine was like bro you should move in with me get an apartment we can smoke drink and do whatever I thought about it and said I feel that I’ve changed a bit and I’d rather not and he say what ever between all of my smoking weed and drinking and how I told my self I would never come back from the church when I was high one time and drunk I don’t know if I saw it or my mind was playing tricks on me but I saw hell and was going to be damed if I went the wrong path I never actually when full off the tracks only 49 percent full 100 would be evil and I would have joined the world not the church and have fun with drugs alcohol girls strippers etc but then I prayed and prayed and listen to the scriptures it changed me for the better from when I was first drinking for years I had that on my mind all the time

  33. I’d pray it go away and come back but when I tried to get my patriarchal blessing I changed spiritually granted in the process I still dipping alcohol rated r movies and etc and as you know to receive it u have to be worthy so it took time but I finally dropped everything except masterbation but the day I received it I was clean that night I will never forget what happened I felt the spirit so much that as if god was behind me with his hands on my shoulder was the best feeling ever that strengthened my testimony for sure because before I never really had an actually testimony but now I do and it’s a growing one at that I believe that the church is true with all my heart for me personally I believe it’s not what the church says not what everyone tells me but from my experience as I went on a darker path and how god helped me come back I’m truly grateful to know the truth also when I was trying to get my patriarchal blessing I was struggling with satan or the opposition I bought a high alcohol percentage beer because I was gonna get drunk and satan was talking to me telling me to drink not to get my patriarchal blessing and that not even god or angels or Jesus could save me from that moment so I was thinking about Lindsey What would she do over and over again so picked the beer up opened it smelled it almost took a drink but then there was a voice there will be no going back it said I got out of the truck set the beer on the ground and got on the ground crying yelling i want it

  34. And going insane for it beating the ground and having a mental alcohol breakdown so I went down the street and almost poured it out but then I sniffed it almost drank the devil was there he said drink and then I thought Lindsey again and asked myself what would she do so I dumped it out and felt a relief and felt good then after that I made a email about it so I could show Lindsey it because I rejected satan and went to the right path and I thought of her so that definitely strengthen my testimony a lot it’s still growing my testimony but it’s a good one I feel in my patriarchal blessing a gift given from god to touch hearts minds of others spiritually that’s very cool my testimony is based off my journey from the darkness to the light I hope to inspire a lot of people in the name of Jesus Christ amen!

  35. Bill,
    Consider yourself lucky, even fortunate, to have been given the gift of excommunication. I can’t get one, and I have been trying for years. I’m 83 years old, BIC, and raised in Mormonism in Southern Utah. I am an Apostate in the real sense, if not yet excommunicated.
    Guess I’ll have to “Resign”? So, good luck to you!
    K. Lee Smith

  36. apostates don’t find fault in the church for fun. They do it so they have something to blame that isn’t themselves. You HAVE to see the fault in yourself instead of the church. The church isn’t the reason you left. YOU are the reason you left. Joseph Smith’s comment about apostasy comes true daily.

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