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What has happened to the comments on Lila tuellers interview I thought her interview went well the sadness of being raised( born into) the church brings up the thought of emotional trauma and it’s lifelong effect this is as hard to understand as Stockholm syndrome the abuse of her brother and the shaving of his head was particularly hard to listen to and obviously left a scar that will be there for an eternity the second anointing was as big a curse as any voo doo spell cast in Haiti to those of us born into this circus it makes me long for a spot outside of the big top but when a person knows nothing but circus the outside world is perceived to be even worse r f m thank you and my thanks go out Lila as well we all have a story but some really need to be told my hat is off to you both sometimes giving some is worse than giving it all
Wow RFM thank you for sharing this. I had an experience when I was 7 years old which I rarely tell but which I might as well put out here.
I had a particularly bad nightmare, dreaming that I had been kidnapped and it somehow involved a cave and two men. When I awoke, I was terrified and I got up the courage to go into my mom and dad’s room and crawl into their bed with them.
I know I was wide awake at this point because my adrenaline was rushing. I was laying faced towards the door to the bedroom. Almost immediately after situating myself in the bed, six people entered the room, lining up by the door, three on one side and three on the other. They were facing each other. The room was dark but no so dark that I couldn’t see walls and objects. I clearly saw these people. They were wearing dark robes and their skin was glossy black. They had no hair and their faces were very glossy.
They stood there briefly and then they pulled out weird looking musical instruments. They held them to their mouths and blew into them. I heard no sound but as they blew into the instruments a seventh one entered between the other six. This one was wearing a crown of thorns and a purple cape. He stopped, and then all seven of them started dancing. Merrily. Then they all stopped at once, looked at me and their eyes glowed red. I immediately closed my eyes and began to pray. I kept praying for a long time, and when I finally had courage to open my eyes again, they were gone. This would have been 1984.
Cool stuff, thanks for sharing.
I don’t think I have any thing quite that macabre to share.
As a kid I would experience sleep paralysis fairly frequently, at least once a week. Obviously this concerned me greatly, and eventually I told my mom. Luckily I have a mom who’s well read and knew what was going on and described how when we sleep our brain ‘disconnects’ from our body so we don’t sleep walk and stuff. And when we wake up sometimes it takes a second to ‘reconnect’, especially if we’re tired.
This gave me a personal example of what I experience may not actually be happening in the real world but only in my mind. Our experience doesn’t define what reality is.
I always look back on that and wonder what would have happened if my mom was superstitious and said it was a demon trying to get me, how much it would have shaped my world view today.
I’ve never ever told a soul what I do to get out of sleep paralysis, never once because I always thought it sounded crazy. So I was very surprised to hear you outline your exit strategy and see that it’s EXACTLY what I do – start with moving eyes because I usually can move those, then a finger, then a couple of fingers, then my hand, and usually by then I’ll be out of it. Usually some sort of nightmarish dream is happening around me, or just a general feeling of dread and discomfort. Either way I want to get out of it ASAP.
So you’re not crazy if other peopLe think this strange…or maybe you are and so am I!